| Islam insists on
kindness toward women, including sexual kindness. Prophet Muhammad, peace
be upon him, loved women. He never, ever, beat his wives, and he commanded
the Muslims in no uncertain terms never to beat their wives. Too many people
have misunderstood verse 4:34 of the Qur’ân out of context, taking
it to allow wife-beating. They don't take into account the whole setting
for the words, isolating them in a way that distorts or falsifies the original
meaning. Another thing everybody has to keep in mind is that the original
Arabic wording of the Qur’ân is the only authentic source of meaning.
If you rely on the translations, you're likely to screw up the meaning.
The meaning of the original Arabic
verb "idrib" (< daraba, basically 'to strike'), which
most translations have presented as meaning 'beat!' has a great many subtle
shades of meaning in Arabic, sometimes even opposite meanings (e.g. 'to
mix, mingle'; 'to separate'; 'to oscillate'; 'to fly'; 'to incline towards';
'to throb'; 'to multiply'; 'to play music'; 'to quote a wise saying'; 'to
move, go for a walk, migrate'; 'to settle down and dwell'; etc.), sensitive
to the context. When you baldly replace that range of meanings with the
single word "beat!" you lose the original intent. You have to understand
the Qur’ân in light of the Qur’ân, and also in the light of
the Prophet's Sunnah. It could not possibly mean striking to hurt with
violence, given the teachings of the Prophet to be kind to women, including
a hadith in which he specifically prohibited wife-beating:
"Do NOT beat
your noble wife like a slave."
(NB: This gets back to Will Durant's
linkage between slavery and the subjugation of women throughout civilizations.)
For the interpretation of verse
4:34, consider the context. It has to do with the means of resolving marital
problems in the best way: the loving, kind way. It's obvious that wife-beating
has no place in this context. Those who want to give Islam a black eye
distort the meaning, but a careful analysis of the context shows up clearly
how false this is.
See The Qur’an: A New Translation
(Princeton University Press, 1993) by Ahmed Ali. (His daughter, Shahana
Ahmed Ali, worked with him on the preparation of it. This is the one Qur’ân
translation that has a woman's input. Something to consider.) In this translation
the verb idrib is taken to mean 'have sexual intercourse with them.'
This stands to reason in the context of the verse. (In several other languages,
the verb to strike is also used to mean sexual intercourse — for
example, it means this in Somali, and the old Germanic verb focken
'to strike' became a well-known word for sexual intercourse in English).
Here is Ahmed Ali's translation
of the passage in question:
As for women you feel
are averse,
talk to them suasively;
then leave them alone in bed
(without molesting them)
and go to bed with them (when
they are willing).
This understanding is explained
in this footnote to the verse:
For the three words
fa-‘izu, wa-hjuru, and wa-dribu in the original, here translated
'talk to them suasively,' 'leave them alone (in bed—fi 'l-madaji‘),'
and 'have intercourse,' respectively, see Raghib, Lisan al-‘Arab,and
Zamakhshari. Raghib in his al-Mufradat fi gharib al-Qur’an gives
the meanings of these words with special reference to this verse. ... Raghib
points out that daraba metaphorically means to have intercourse,
and quotes the expression daraba al-fahl al-naqah "the stud camel
covered the she-camel," which is also quoted by Lisan al-‘Arab.
It cannot be taken here to mean 'to strike them (women).' This view is
strengthened by the Prophet's authentic hadith found in a number of authorities,
including Bukhari and Muslim: "Could any of you beat your wife as he would
a slave, and then lie with her in the evening?" There are other traditions
in Abu Da’ud, Nasa’i, Ibn Majah, Ahmad ibn Hanbal, and others, to the effect
that he forbade the beating of any woman, saying: "Never beat God's
handmaidens."
The "idrib" stage in the
process follows temporary separation of the spouses: notice how among the
many meanings of the verb daraba, there are the meanings 'to separate'
and 'to mingle'. The sense of separation relates back to the verb uhjur
immediately preceding, while the senses of inclining towards, mingling,
settling down, and having sex are looking ahead to the marital reconciliation
(tawfîq) in the next verse. This is a good example of the
extremely subtle, intricate intertwining of meanings in the Arabic words
of the Qur’ân, which is lost in translation. The guidance in this
verse is part of a process for reconciling marital problems. After the
husband has made it clear to his wife what he expects of their relationship
(and presumably the wife has made her thoughts on it clear to him, also),
it's time to kiss and make up. See what beautiful guidance Allah is giving
husbands and wives here. We know from other hadiths that encourage sacred
sex in Islam that Allah is happy when husband and wife have sexual intercourse,
and they are showered with spiritual blessings when they do.
And the beat goes on. . . . |